How to Encourage your Child to be more Independent

An example of a child's star chart, targeting increased independence within the home.

Have you ever seen a sticker chart? Or job chart? Or chore chart? 

These charts are all examples of a token system, wherein specific tasks or expectations are laid out for a child, and then stickers or smiley faces or check marks are delivered once these tasks are completed or expectations are met. Once the chart is filled up, the child typically gains access to a preferred item or activity. 

Token systems are the best. 

They're easy to make, easy to implement, and best of all, encourage independence and self-management skills while increasing compliance. 

The secret to an effective token system lies within these 7 steps: 

1. Create a chart, similar to the one above, that clearly communicates to your child what tasks they need to complete (Pro Tip: Use pictures, and don't go overboard with wordiness or too many tasks. It's ok to target only 1 task or expectation at first. We want to set your child up for success, not frustrate him or her.)
2. Explain the rules and expectations
3. Create a menu, with your child's help, of items/activities that your child can work toward earning by filling up the chart
4. Deliver those tokens liberally at first, to ensure that your child is successful
5. Deliver tokens immediately following completion of the targeted step
6. Once the chart is filled, allow your child to select a preferred item or activity from the menu and deliver it immediately
7. Start again!

As your child becomes more independent with completing the chart, you will be able to begin to increase your expectations and require a greater response for fewer preferred items or activities. In other words, start out by having your child exchange their tokens for that preferred item or activity at the end of each day. Then, begin to gradually increase it to every 2 days, then 3 days, and onward to once per week. Eventually, you may even find that the tokens alone are reinforcing enough to maintain the targeted behaviors!

Now get out there and make it rain stickers!